Oh My Stars
by Fern G. Z. Carr

              To the cast of “Bewitched” who gave
              us eight seasons of laughter – R.I.P.

Samantha, devoted wife and witch, straddling two worlds –
colon cancer

No-Witchcraft-in-My-House Darrin #1 and 2 –
emphysema and prostate cancer

haughty Endora, forever casting spells on Darrin –
uterine cancer

the shenanigans of guffawing prankster Uncle Arthur –
heart attack

dotty but loving, doorknob-collecting Aunt Clara –
heart attack

eagle-eyed Mrs. Kravitz, Snoop #1 and 2 –
ovarian cancer and stroke

henpecked and wilfully oblivious Mr. Kravitz –
bladder cancer

debonair Maurice, Shakespearean “act–tore” –
cancer

Dollar-Signs-in-the-Eyes, Make-a-Buck Larry Tate –
heart attack

The-Women-behind-Their-Man Louise Tate #1 and 2 –
unspecified death and stroke

I-Think-I’m-Getting-One-of-My-Sick-Headaches Mrs. Stephens –
Alzheimer’s

congenial, easy-going Mr. Stephens #1 and 2 –
heart attacks

jittery, inept housekeeper Esmeralda –
colon cancer and stroke

Cousin Serena, Sam’s quasi-identical alter ego –
still couldn’t dodge the colon cancer.

With all the witches and warlocks
in this group,

it’s a wonder that a spell wasn’t cast on the cast
in an attempt to reverse this deadly curse.